Here’s a fun april fools day prank you can do. Sneak into my room and place thousands of dollars everywhere. Just on everything. Cover my things with an insane amount of money. Make it a real hassle to clean up. The more money the better the prank.
MY MOM JUST TOLD ME TO CREMATE HER AND PUT HER ASHES IN AN HOUR GLASS SO THAT EVEN AFTER SHE’S DEAD AND GONE SHE CAN CONTINUE TELLING ME HOW MUCH TIME I’M WASTING.
fun fact: Michael Cera asked Rihanna if he could slap her ass for real and she said “you can slap my ass for real if I can slap you in the face for real” and he was like alright. and they did the take like 3 times and Michael was like “you’re not hitting me hard enough do it for real” and then she slapped the fuck out of him and threw off his equilibrium so much he had to go lay down in his trailer for like half an hour lmao and that’s the take they used in the movie with no added sound effects
Hey kids, as we approach Halloween I just wanted you guys to be careful and say DON’T FUCK WITH SPIRITS. Don’t mess with Ouija Boards, don’t talk to no dead people, don’t fuck with demons, don’t summon shit, don’t dick around in abandoned buildings. If you are considering a thing, just think, “would a white person in a horror movie do this thing?” If the answer is yes, then don’t do the thing.
Shia LaBeouf Is Currently Doing Some Kind of Super Artsy Thing in Los Angeles
As you’ve probably heard by now, Actor, director, and mirror to our tortured souls, Shia LaBeouf is doing some sort of performance art thing in Los Angeles.
The exhibition/performance/whatever is called #IAMSORRY and is being held at 7354 Beverly Blvd until Sunday.
I headed down to check it out.
I arrived expecting a huge line, but there was none. Just one other guy and a security guard. The guard told me that I was the 75th person to see the exhibit, and that I had to go in alone, “because we don’t want anyone else to ruin your experience.”
After about five minutes of waiting, the security guy gave me the once over with a metal detector, and I was allowed inside.
I ended up in a room with a bunch of objects laid out on a table. I managed to sneak a photo.
There was a ukelele, a bottle of Jack Daniels, a bowl containing print-outs of mean tweets about Shia, a bowl of Hershey’s Kisses, a bottle of Brut cologne, a copy of The Death Rayby Daniel Clowes, an Optimus Prime action figure, some pliers and a whip.
A woman told me to choose an object. I picked up the bowl of mean tweets about Shia.
A copy of the press release for whatever this thing is.
Bowl in hand, the woman led me through a curtain and into a small room.
Shia was sitting at a small wooden table in the center of the space. He was wearing a suit and the “I AM NOT FAMOUS ANYMORE" bag that he had on his head in Berlin.
The woman left, and it was just me and Shia. I didn’t sneak a photo of him, out of respect for his art (JK, I chickened out.)
I sat down opposite him. As far as I could tell, I wasn’t being filmed and nobody was listening in.
After sitting there for a few seconds with Shia staring at me in silence, I said, “So you’re not gonna talk, huh?” He didn’t respond.